Regulated or dysregulated? Learn the signs

Dec 1

Is your mind (or the body) running the show...but not you?

This might sound funny, but what I mean is: do you notice yourself overthinking, feeling stressed, rationalising, and dysregulated?

Constantly trying to get ahead of your stress levels and anxiety, feeling overwhelmed and like you can't seem to get on top of it?

Endless to-do lists, chores always behind, a constant feeling of urgency because you only deal with what needs to be dealt with, no time for yourself, creative projects or fun and play in your life?

How about adding some doomscrolling into the mix, hours of watching streaming services or getting caught up on social media platforms.

Sometimes, this numbing behaviour might even feel nice and like a relief. But in the end, it ends up putting more stress on your body and mind.

Leaving you with a fried brain, usually also depleted and exhausted at the end of the day, to repeat the cycle again tomorrow.🥲

If you are neurodivergent on top of it (ADHD, autism, AuDHD etc.) it can feel even more intense. And dysregulation can happen much quicker. Sensations, circumstances, or external factors can feel overwhelming very quickly, and it can take longer to bounce back to a calmer, more regulated state in your body and mind.

This is why practising self-regulation (or co-regulation with others) is so important.

Throughout the years, I did a lot of self-exploration and tried out many methods, learned and studied many of them, and no matter from which angle I look at it, it always comes back to this:

A regulated body & mind, a regulated nervous system.

With ADHD, I find this especially important, but im sure this also applies to people without it. Finding your way back into a safe and grounded state is the key to most of the other challenges, problems and questions we experience in life.

Let me first show you how a dysregulated body, mind, and nervous system might feel. Because we are often not even aware of how dysregulated we are.

And there is also nothing wrong with it as such. The nervoys system is doing its job to protect you, sending your body into a response state. (Flight, Fight, Freeze, Fawn)

It becomes an issue when we are constantly stuck in one of those states, and it becomes chronic. What took me the longest to realise was that I often thought I was regulated, but realised in hindsight, when REALLY feeling regulated, that I wasn't. So it's easy to not recognise the signs of dysregulation.

So there is no judgment here about feeling dysregulated or not noticing it.

If you are not sure but you are still reading this, you most likely experience some signs of dysregulation.

Some of the signs of dysregulation are:

constant overthinking
anxiety
irritability
stress
on high alert/hypervigilant
shut down mode
feeling numb
emotionally dysregulated
racing mind
impulsitivity
procrastination
restlessness
forgetfulness
scattered mind
fearful
surviving, not thriving

So, what can be done to return to a more regulated state? Feeling safe in your body, experiencing a more grounded mind and more presence? A sense of peace and inner calm?

The good news is, this is where the regulation comes in. Through regulating practices, such as breathwork or other modalities, we can regulate through our nervoys system, letting our mind and body know: it's okay to rest. You can release stress. We can just be.

Returning to an inner state of calm, wisdom, peace and contentment.